Do You Expect Too Much?
RESPONSE SCALE
0 = Don't know 1 = Strongly disagree 2 = Disagree 3 = Agree 4 = Strongly agree
_______ 1. My partner can and will meet all of my needs.
_______2. Our current problems can all be resolved by spending more time together.
_______ 3. If we commit to it, I believe my mate and I can overcome any problem or struggle.
_______ 4. My partner and I want exactly the same things from our marriage.
_______ 5. With mutual willingness to teach and learn, our sex life will get better with each passing year.
_______ 6. I believe I will always feel in love with my mate.
_______ 7. My partner and I fully understand each other.
_______ 8. My mate can and should be my best friend.
_______ 9. I expect romantic feelings in our marriage to come and go, largely controlled by our own actions.
_______ 10. My partner is everything I've ever dreamed a spouse should be.
_______ 11. I don't believe there will ever be any serious problems in our relationship.
_______ 12. My partner and I have resolved all the issues from our pasts that could affect our relationship.
_______ 13. I believe marriage is a gift from God and that overall it will be a very enjoyable experience.
_______ 14. I believe our sexual relationship will always be wonderful and free from conflict.
_______ 15. Being involved in a church will keep us from having serious marital struggles.
Total Score _______
WHAT YOUR SCORE MEANS
0-30 You're wearing dark glasses. Either your view of marriage is somewhat negative, or you are uncertain on a number of marital issues. Seek counsel from a pastor or a wise, older friend who has a healthy, fun marriage.
31-40 Your glasses are clear. You have a fairly realistic expectation of marriage. But seek outside input regarding any areas in which you answered "don't know."
41-50 Your glasses have a rose tint to them. You are very optimistic about marriage, but tend to minimize problems and differences. Find a mentor who will bring realism yet not destroy your excitement.
51-60 Your glasses are completely rose colored. You are heading toward a major relationship crisis due to failed expectations.
