Stressless Saturday: Reframing

Several years ago I left the church that I grew up in. The church that felt like home to me. It wasn’t because I moved away, but because of some major problems in the church. I won’t go into the gory details, but it was a necessary move for our family. I remember thinking that it would be easier for me to move across the country than to make the move to a new church. It was a painful time. One of the things that I discovered in the move was the psychological technique of reframing. Somehow, if I was going to survive emotionally, I had to change the way I looked at the move.

Interestingly enough, I found that there was a great opportunity that I hadn’t realized in going to a new church. No one knew me there. While that was what I feared, it also meant that no one had any preconceived ideas about who I was and what I was capable of. In my home church I was viewed as “shy little Diane,” a description that no longer fit, but kept people from seeing my potential. I was able to recreate myself in the new church. I took on responsibilities that would have never been offered at my home church. It was an exciting time!

I learned that the way I looked at the situation affected how I felt about it. When I focused on the loss of my home church I felt depressed, lonely, and mad. But when I began to focus on the opportunities of going to a new church I was energized, optimistic, and excited. Same situation…two outlooks.

Reframing is a powerful tool that can help us refocus our attention from the negative to the positive. So, the next time you are going through a stressful situation, try to reframe and refocus…there may be a hidden benefit that you’re not seeing!